Monday, December 24, 2012

Sequestering the Grinch

Turkey Trot 2012

This year my sister in law and her family joined us for Thanksgiving. As a large percentage of us are runners, we entered in our local Turkey Trot 5k run. Being a distance runner I don't train much for a 5k, and have no idea how fast I can run one in, I did know I could do at least an 8:45. My sister in law, who runs 5ks ensured me I could do better, so I stuck with her for the race. In the end we crossed the line with a time of 25:30 which puts us just under a 8:19 pace! That's my fastest 5k ever!!!
Here is the picture of the whole trotting crew!

Christmas Eve's Eve

In keeping with this year's theme of "sequester the Grinch" I offered (with B's suggestion) to host Christmas with my dad. The two youngest brothers, Nik and Alix, have been working out of state/town and miraculously they were both home on the eve of Christmas Eve.

Pulling from the decorations already placed around the house and a great clearance table cloth from Target, I very inexpensively created a festive table. Madison cut snowflakes and made place cards with them.

For dinner I made pork loin which was brined over night then stuffed and rubbed with a garlic rosemary paste and baked in a bath of white wine. It turned out devine! For sides we had sage sweet potatoes and pan roasted Brussels with bacon and pine nuts, and rolls. I had made the sauce for my favorite green beans the night before and completely forgot about that dish. For dessert we had applesauce spice cake and cheese cake. I think it is safe to say no one left hungry.

After waiting very patiently through dinner and the after dinner conversation Maddox prompted us to move on to gifts. Machelle gave Madison a plethora of scarves- which she loved! Maddox got a razor 360 bike that he had been asking for, and Megan and Nik got the kids this great puzzle game that we have been playing with all night and this morning.

We all enjoyed watching Maddox ride his new bike in the frigid night just to show off the sparks it emits when he pulled the emergency brake.

Alix and his wife ended up not coming- revealing I have a double standard, and causing me to reevaluate my own attitude of Christmas and the "required" visits. Giving me all the more reason to continue my quest to "sequester the Grinch".

So here's to the beginning of a very merry Christmas- spent with FAMILY.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Thankful November

I love that for the month of November (at least in non-presidential election years) fb fills with posts of gratitude.  this year I decided to partake in the challenge of finding the things that I am thankful for.  Here is what actually ended up on my fb page for *most* of the month...

Day 1: Thankful for beautiful weather that allows us to run in tanks and shorts though it's November in Colorado.

Day 2: Nov. 2: Today I'm thankful that I have the right to vote and for the short lines at early voting!

Day 3: I am thankful for amazing news!!! Just received news that my good friend from Denver is moving back!

Day 4: Today I'm thankful for the whole extra hour of uninterrupted reading time due to Day Light Savings!

Day 5: I am thankful for my friend Allison, who has demonstrated what it is to trust God, and inspires me regularly to do so myself.

Day 6: I am thankful for the individual time I got to spend with each of my kids today. It never seems to happen often enough, so I cherish the spare hour every once in a while.

Day 7: Today I am thankful for the Word of God, that give peace and births faith.

Day 8: I am thankful for family dinners. Even if Maddox wiggles so much the bolts on his chair are loose and Madison dominates the conversation with middle school drama though insisting she's not in the drama scene. I love that we are all together, talking and sharing our day.

Day 9: Today I am thankful for an amazing teaching partner. We work so well together and have SO much fun traveling to conferences all over the country! Next up our own backyard, Denver!!! Hope you have a fabulous birthday riding the rim in your tutu!!!

Day 10: I'm thankful alone time during retail therapy today.

Day 11: I am thankful to have an amazing partner in this journey called parenthood. My husband is an excellent example to both of our children of what a man/husband/father should be- hard working provider, protective, and selfless to name a few. I pray that Maddox will grow to be a great man like his dad, and Madison will find one of his caliber to share her life with.

Day 12: I am so thankful for my friend Anne! She encourages me in my life with prayer and scripture. She can tell me things that are difficult to hear and know we will both be better for it. She is the best running partner (one that is completely ok with skipping a run when life gets crazy OR because we would rather pop open a bottle of wine and start cooking together). Thank you Anne for your amazing friendship.

Day 13(only 5hours late): I am thankful to have made it to Denver safely, for the hysterical laughter in the way over, an incredible view of the city from or 31st floor room, 5 days of conference attending, 5 nights if city life, and 120+ hours of no responsibilities. (Man I'm going to miss my family by weeks end.)

Day 14: I am thankful for good company to debrief the massive amounts in information we received today, all over French Martinis.

Day 16: I am thankful for the birth of a beautiful new life, Oslin Sandoval, came in to the world today, becoming Vycci and Danny’s 4th child and another Sandoval life that I have the honor of being a part of.

Day 17: I'm thankful for a lovely girls night out with my sister in law. She picked me up in her new car ;) and took me to dinner and desserts that were so delicious she got caught licking the plate! Love you and I'm so thankful for our great conversation, love you Krick!

Day 18: I'm thankful that my husband endures live sporting events for me. (B forgot a hat, so he's thankful for the rally towels they were handing out at the gates.) I think I'll spare him further embarrassment and go buy him a new hat...

Day 19: I am blessed beyond measure, abundantly thankful, and blissfully happy to have Brian as my husband. Happy birthday to my my best friend, and favorite person to live life with. I love you!

Day 20: I'm thankful for modern conveniences, especially a heated home, and running hot water. Think I'll go take advantage of it with a nice soak and book.

Day 21: I am thankful for a house full of family, children laughing, running, and playing, and most of all that we get to share the day together.  Happy Thanksgiving 2012.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Kings and Elections

As I picked my Bible up this week, the bookmarks still at the beginning of 2 Kings where I last left off (in February), I thought it only fitting that I would be reading about the kings of Israel and Judah as this week was election week for the United States of America.   As in every election there is political drama, and this election was no different.  It was easy to allow myself to get caught up in the drama, and even allow fear, panic, and anger to take root.

This week while looking back through 1st Kings, I saw that Israel had its overwhelming share of terrible, ungodly, and even evil rulers, and God was there with His people.  Just as God is with me in the midst of this countries abominable political situation. Whether Obama continues to drive our country farther and farther into debt, or IF Romney would have brought the extinction of the middle class and taken away "women's rights", my trust is NOT in man but in God who has promised to never leave or forsake me.
Rulers- they come and go as we've see through out the Bible, only God is truly constant.  Therefore, my focus is not on complaining about the politics of this country, but seeking God with my entire being,  and finding ways to love people as He loves them. 

Because in the end, that is the only thing that will matter. (1 Cor 13:13 Psalm 94:14)

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Fall Festivities

Celebrating the fact that soccer is over for the season (don't worry, winter trainings will start up soon an reclaim soccer's prominent time commitment in our lives) and Maddox is in a lull between flag football and wrestling, we decided to spend our Monday evening enjoying the beautiful fall weather by getting lost in a local corn maze.

Studt's is much more than just a corn maze, and has so many activities that kept us all  entertained until the twilight hour fell.   From a petting zoo with vocal piggies (my favorite), baby goats (Madison's favorite), skittish alpacas (B's favorite)and the Thanksgiving Turkey fattening itself in preparation for next months feast (Maddox's favorite)   ,
to GIGANTIC air trampolines,
 and even a hay bail tower with a massive slide

- getting lost in the maze soon became the side attraction!

Once in the maze we stuck together for a while, but being the competitive family we are we split off into teams with the challenge being the first to find our way out. 

B and Madison hurried off in one direction wile the boy and I ran in another.  Maddox was so intent on winning that he just took off in the lead; I finally had to tell him that mommy would break her ankle if we kept running over the furrowed field at our current pace.  His panic set in when I received a text from B and Madison saying they have made their way out.  I finally had to tell him that I appreciated his competitive nature, and wanted him to always try his best and want to win, but right now he was so worried about winning (loosing) that he was making a fun activity not so fun.  (I am sure this is a conversation I will have on a regular basis with him.) He pulled it together, and didn't even complain to his dad and sister when we made our own way out of the stalks a few short minutes later.

Before leaving we made sure to have some fun pumpkin head photo ops...

And my favorite photo of the evening...

As we headed out of the parking lot the harvest moon rose above the bookcliffs, providing a picturesque ending to a fabulous fall evening.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Pumpkin Carvin

It is becoming a tradition for Brian's siblings to gather our families for an evening of jack-o-lantern creating. All the grand kids haul their pumpkin patch finds to their grandmas kitchen. Each jabbering their creative concepts above the voices of the other.

Tastey treats and a warm pot of chili, do their part to tame our bellies.

The aroma of spiced cider hanging heavy in the air in stark contrast to the crisp autumn cross breeze cooling as they work.

Wrinkled noses, oohs, and giggles accompany the removal of innards. Next Sharpies are wielded marking one of a kind designs.

Carving tools, from butcher knives, to battery operated mini saber saws, scattered across the tables are ready to do their part in the metamorphosis from pumpkin to art.

Our final products this year: Harry Potter, Zombie Brains, little Myla Face, a ghostly ghoul, and a Peyton Manning Bronco.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Life's Calling

Contemplating life's calling. . . 
Some days it would be easier to believe that we are not meant to do the things we have been called to do, for then we could abandon with no consequence. 
But when you know that what you are doing is EXACTLY what you were meant for, the cost of persevering is miniscule to the cost of quitting.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Prayers of a 6 Year Old Boy

Dear God,
I pray that my mom feels better soon and that my dog's farts don't stink tonight.

(Maddox's prayer the other night).

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Crabtree Family Weekend Year Two

For the second year in a row my mom and her husband planned a fabulous weekend get away for all of their kids and grand kids.  This year we went to the Hilltop House in Mesa Colorado.  This place was HUGE, comfortable accommodating all 18 of us.  2 grand parents, 4 children and their 4 spouses, 7 grand children, and one friend of Madison's made the trek this year.

My mom and Dan are so creative in finding fun activities for us all to do.  The first morning we had a fishing derby, complete with 6 pink Barbi fishing poles, and one yellow-very boyish-pole, power bait, fish eggs, awards for biggest, most, and first fish, and 2 adults for every kiddy fisher... the only thing missing were the fish... not a single bite.

They also hung glow-in-the-dark stars in the bushes around the cabin to provide fun star watching during the Blue Moon weekend.  The kids were captivated with a nature scavenger hunt, going on a hike and trying to spot animal poop and prints, flowers, insects, and even some man made items like fence posts and power poles.  Dan took the older girls (Madison and her friend Gracey) on a hike up to the flag pole on the summit of Beehive Mountain.

Thanks to Kristen we had a tie dyeing adventure, where all the kids came away with a brightly colored shirt, and us ladies turned our shirts into pretty amazing scarves.
Amazingly all the kids behaved and played really well together for the majority of the weekend, making it a pleasant experience for the rest of us.

Brian had to work so my mom made a cardboard cut out of his head so he could be included in the fun event pictures.  We got a lot of good laughs and great entertainment by placing Biran in random photo ops. I was thankful that he made it up after work on Saturday to help me cook dinner, and we managed to get in a family picture as well.

A HUGE thank you to my mom and Dan for putting all this together for us, it is greatly appreciated and completely enjoyed by this Caster Clan!

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Happy 40th Rob!

My sister-in-law's husband Rob celebrated his 40th birthday last weekend, of course the event couldn't go unnoticed, or even creep by quietly!  What a fabulous party it was!  Myla wanted Rob to have a giant water slide bump and jump, and it was a huge hit with all the kids.

Christie and I spent the entire morning making Rob's bouquet and birthday cake.  The bouquet was an idea I found on pinterest months ago and had been saving specially for this day.  The cake was an idea Christie found and modified.  Since we had a Jack Daniels theme going we spice the home made butter cream frosting with a few teaspoons of Jack Daniels, and WOW! it was amazing.  We had so much fun creating these two special gifts for Rob.  Rob absolutely loved them, and they were a big hit at the party.

The next one will be Carrie's( years away), and we are already making plans for her big day cake and goodies.

Learned: Using fondant was way easier than I thought, hot glue guns are miracle workers, and a morning spent crafting makes for great memory making.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Back to School 2012

For the first time in, I don't know, possibly ever, I left the school on our last pre-student work day feeling completely prepared for the masses to arrive early Monday morning.

The extra hours I put in to get there were totally worth it, as I completely enjoyed my last official weekend of summer (post upcoming). But the best part, I was really able to focus on my motherly duties getting the kids ready for their first days. I made the whole family delicious lunches, and got up early enough to make a real breakfast- French toast and scrambled eggs.

Maddox has been begging, hoping and even preparing himself for first grade all last week. He forced himself to get up early, and abstain from naps,"because I am not going to get to nap in first grade mom!" this seemed to work out great as this morning truly was the smoothest in Caster history!

The after school report from both of them, though vague, leave me with high hopes and a positive outlook for the year.

As for me I made a lasting impression on a select few 6th grade students as I slipped in my heals and went flying into their classroom, landing practically on my face and splaying the stack of papers across the room. This was their very first experience of middle school; whether it made them laugh or realize that nothing they could do would ever be that embarrassing, I'm happy to provide them with a bit of humor and confidence. Since this happened first thing I also had a great first day of school horror story to share with all my classes. (and comedic relief for some staff as well.) The only saving grace I have in this is I *think* my dress managed to stay put around my bum and not fly over my head....

Both my kids looked amazing, and all too grown up. And truthfully I'm no worse for wear, my ankle was already sore.... All in all a good memorable start to the year!

Thursday, August 16, 2012


Last Saturday I ran my best half ever!

Remember my super secret goal of running it in under 2 hours, well I met it! 13.1 miles in 1:56:01. Needless to say I am do ecstatic about the results.

Here are a few pics from the event. I have a few more on flicker that I will share later.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Revisiting a Tradition: 4th of July

Over the years we (the Caster's) have spent many of our 4th of July celebrations with Allsion.  Most of which have occurred in the mountains just East of us at a family cabin, where we would roast marshmallows, delight in how amazing beer tastes while camping, and honestly not care that our children were covered in the black earth for the duration of the trip. Before the sun got too low in the sky, we would load both families up in the truck and trek down the hill to enjoy "the bombs bursting in air". We had the perfect perch on the hill just outside Collbran, all of us in awe of the spectacular show that always exceeded our expectations.

It's been a few years since we have celebrated our country's independence, so this year we planned a grand return to the once vibrant tradition. A multi-day camping trip just outside of Gunnison.  As will all grandiose plans, the seem great at the time but when reality sets in, you begin to see the flaws:  First- the fire ban across Colorado (this year nearly the entire state was burning up- from Ft. Collins to Colorado Springs and even in our own back yard of Debeque.)  And what fun is camping with no camp fire to enchant the evenings and warm the mornings?  Second: required portable toilette - no more outhouse on the property, instead the new covenants state we have to have a septic or transport our poo out.  Third: the remembrance of Allsion and I attempting a week long camping trip with the kids that ended MUCH sooner than anticipated. We had expected a week of non-stop friend time knitting, relaxing, chatting, and perfectly behaved children.  What we got was quite the opposite, and just remembering was enough to scare me out of committing to what possibly could be a repeat of that.

The Revised Plan: Collbran pancake breakfast, parade, and a trip up to a quiet little stream to splash the afternoon heat away.  This was actually a perfect replacement.  Besides the long line for the pancake breakfast, the whole days was a nice little escape.  The parade is one of the best I have ever been to, not for the amazing creativity level of the floats, but for the uniqueness and plethora of treats that are thrown to the children lining the sidewalk- can you say OTTER POPS.  Yes we were abundantly supplied with frozen otter pop popsicles and the kids loved it.  After the parade we made our way up and around my favorite lake, Atkinson, to the inlet stream.  The kids, even though it was cool and cloudy, spent the rest of the afternoon splashing in the creek and exploring, while we adults sat and enjoyed the scenery and company.  Our afternoon came to a beautiful close when rain clouds rolled in and had mercy on our dry parched state. 

I have never in my life been more happy for a downpour.

Sunday, July 15, 2012

My Next Half

I have officially registered! I've been walking the line of non commitment for a while now, and it is really only hurting my miles.  So in an effort to take running a bit more seriously (and get my booty out of bed every morning) I crossed the line to committed and will be running my next 13.1 miles from Georgetown to Idaho Springs on August 11, 2012!

I'm actually really excited for this race.  I am feeling really good, no major ailment  - well maybe a inkling of a twinge in my hip flexor - but the stronger I get the less its bugging me.  My last half was my pr  of 2:00:56, so my goal for this half is to run it in 2:05:00 or less. (Secretly I would love to see a 1 as the first number there, but if I told anybody else that, and then didn't accomplish it, I would feel like a failure)  Plus, I think a 2:05 is a great time and completely reasonable.  There are just too many factors and variables that play into my race day success, and I just don't have it down to a science, yet - or maybe even never - and I am completely ok with that.

Training is currently on track, but man is it difficult to squeeze in considering my running buddy is gone on vacation, followed by my trip to Idaho later this month.  This leaves us to run alone for most of the week, and somehow find time to run our long runs in the overlaps of our schedule. Anne hasn't registered, though she is leaving the possibility open. 

Christie is also running, and we have a really great girls weekend in store OR a nice couples retreat in store depending on how things shape up as we approach the date.

So here's to another great half!

The Bronz Horseman

The Bronze Horseman (Tatiana and Alexander, #1)

I am breathless, having just read 637 pages of adventure, love, secrets, betrayal, heartache, and sacrifice. I must admit that there were times I wanted to give up on the book. Like when I first picked it up from the library and it was so huge! Not that I don't like reading, or couldn't finish that many pages, but it seemed like a really big commitment to make to a book! Then again during frustrating - no maddening- arguments between Tatiana and Alexander! I could hardly bare the intensity and insanity of it. And again during such deep heartache and loss; if I could barely make it through another page, I couldn't see how the characters would manage another breath. But isn't this what great books do to us, don’t they evoke such intense feelings and create vivid images that we feel as though we are living along side it? At one point, during the blockade, when food was scarce and rations were dwindling, I was called away from the book to have lunch with my family. It was the strangest feeling eating, I felt as though I needed to save part of my meal for later, not knowing where or when the next bite of food would come. That’s how immersed I became.

The second World War has always fascinated me, and I have read many historical fiction books from this time period, though none have been from the perspective from the Communist Russia. I found this love story set during WWII Soviet Union, spellbinding. Reading about communism from the perspective of someone who never knew any different. The living conditions, shared kitchens and bathrooms, multiple generations sharing two rooms, bread lines, and ration cards are so foreign to me.

It was intriguing to see how the ideals of communism broke down during the time of war, and in its place self enterprise was rewarded with food and money. How some Soviets viewed Hitler and Stalin as two sides of the same coin. . .

It was, again, appalling to see just how fierce and strong the Germans were, and just how close they came to reaching their goal. This book is a brutal reminder that many suffered, many starved, and many died at the hands of one man's ideals.

But this is not the heart of this story, just the intricate weaving of place and time. This story is much, much, more. It is a story of love, and the sacrifices one will make for that love. Whether that love be for family, for country, for self, or for a lover - a soul mate, love demands sacrifice. That is what this story is, it is a story of sacrifice.

Sunday, June 10, 2012


Divergent (Divergent, #1)Divergent by Veronica Roth

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I took a break from the dystopia genera for a bit, but this read was a nice welcome back. Imagine living in a society where only 5 virtues remain, and at the age of 16 you must proclaim your faction, the virtue you will live by for the rest of your life. While most people choose the faction they were raised in, some choose to convert, and in a rare case they find themselves Divergent. Faced with the choice of abandoning her faction of selflessness and following her heart to the faction that embodies fearlessness, is only compounded when her faction are being scrutinized and blamed, bringing the society to the brink of a revolution.

When Beatrice discovers that she is Divergent she has no idea the danger she is in or the impact she could have in the revolution. Making her choice to join the fearless, she soon realizes that there is a fine line between being selfless and fearless, while seeing the truth behind her divergent nature.

Excellent young adult read, full of rebellion, thrills, and even love.

View all my reviews

Monday, June 4, 2012

The Absolutely True Diary of a Part Time Indian

The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time IndianThe Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Think diary of a wimpy kid + crass hormonal high school boy + a lot of surprisingly deep meaning of life lessons.

It was funny, funny enought that I chuckled out loud multiple times.

I'm not sure I can recommend it to my students though, as I think the only thing they will get from the book is this dude talks about masterbation (only like 3 times in the whole book), but that is what a middle school boy is going to remember.

View all my reviews

Ranger "Danger" 12/28/2005- 5/31/12

He is gone.

I dropped him off at the vet early Thursday morning, I thought they would be giving him an IV and breathing treatments.  I thought Brian would come home and pick him up and in a few days he would be back to normal.

I thought wrong and he is gone.

It all happened so fast, it took all of us by surprise. Even the vet was ready to send him home with us (after giving us nebulizer training) to nurse him back to health.  As Brian showed up to bring him home, he was told "I thought I was going to be giving you your dog, instead I have to tell you that he has passed."

We are shocked, he is gone.

En rout to Park City, passing over mountain peaks, I received a call, one I thought would tell me that he had made great improvement, and was coming home.  Instead, I learned of our loss.

In harmony Madison and I wailed in grief, he is gone.

A weekend filled with soccer, gave a decent distraction for the two of us.  Reality crept in with the darkness of night.  I could fold up my sorrow and tuck it away, but knew it was temporary, I'd soon be home and faced with reality.

Our home had a gaping hole, he is gone.

It was cancer that had devastated his lungs, making them unable to fight off the pneumonia.  He wouldn't have made it much longer, and the reality is he only suffered a short time, and we never had to make the decision to let him go.

It was so fast, he is gone.

Brian said how fitting it was, Ranger never did anything small, it was always huge; He'd find the stinkiest mud hole to wallow in, he'd escape from the yard by busting a hole clean through the fence, he didn't chew on toys, he instead chewed the stairs.  The cancer was massive, his death was speedy.

He went big, he is gone.

I didn't say good bye, I didn't think it was the end. But looking back, he knew.  He let me brush him for hours, he let me lay with him and hold him.  He didn't come inside his last night with us, he laid out , in his favorite place under the bush. Had he been able, I think he would have wandered into the wilderness and laid in a stinky mud hole for his final rest.

He knew, he said good bye, and now he is gone.

Ranger, our snow dog,
Snowshoeing 2010

Snowshoeing 2010

Snowshoeing 2010
Just Enjoying the Snow

Ranger, our fluff ball,
Mandison and Ranger at 8 wks

Ranger, our pillow
Could they get more onrey!
Madison's furry pillow.

Ranger our goof ball,
This is MY Spot!
Marti Gras Dog

Ranger our friend.

Trying to Catch fish at Bonita


He may be gone, but his presence was a present.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Surprising, Overwhelming, Gushing, Love

We have 3 dogs. We used to have 2 dogs. And a really, really, long time ago (10 years) we only had one dog.  I never have had an overwhelming desire to have pets, most furry ones make me itch, dogs are most often an exception to that.  So don't ask me how we have now ended up with THREE dogs.  Maybe its a testament to the soft spot in my heart for lost causes... our first was a rescue, and the latest was an inheritance... only the middle one was by planning and choice.  Since we now have 3 dogs, my house is a disaster, the amount of fur has not tripled, or increased by 1/2, instead it has been an exponential increase.  As of late this has been the primary source of annoyance, and anxiety for me.

So why not just get rid of them, or even just one of them?  I don't seem all that attached, right?  It seems like a completely logical and easy decision. 

At least this is what I thought until one of them gets sick, like really sick.  Labored breathing, hacking, lethargic, and the tell tell sign - not eating.  The dog who tells time by when his food bowl should be filled won't eat.  Of course I took him to the vet yesterday, they checked him out, made sure he didn't have heart worm, and gave him some antibiotics, a bronchial-dilator, and anti-inflammatory.  I headed home with a renewed sense of hope, he would soon be on the mend. 

Last nigh I laid with him just so he wouldn't be alone, but his extremely labored breathing was so reminiscent of my own during an asthma attack, and all I could do was weep, the fear and panic I feel during an attack must be horrible for him - not knowing what is wrong.

Then again this morning he wouldn't eat.  We kept him inside out of the heat, and calm.  I was expecting to come home to a markedly improved dog, but when I got home he coughed up blood.  Of course the vet was out of the office by that time, so he goes in first thing in the morning. 

All evening I have just sat and brushed, and snuggled, and cried with worry for him.  Who would have though that below all that indifference I feel - or thought I felt - for these dogs, that I actually care this much, that I actually LOVE them.

This overwhelming, heart wrenching, tear jerking emotion has caught me completely off guard.  I tolerated, and most of the time even like these furry boys, but this is just so completely unexpected. To love an animal so much that I spend the night laying next to and comforting them, and sobbing tears, pleading with God to make him be ok. It's surprising to say the least.

Tonight I just hope his sleep is peaceful, that we make it till the morning, and that tomorrow they will know what is wrong with him.
Best Buds

Learned: Something new about myself, behind this cold hard indifferent exterior is an animal lover at heart.