Prayers of a 6 Year Old Boy

Dear God,
I pray that my mom feels better soon and that my dog's farts don't stink tonight.
Amen.

(Maddox's prayer the other night).

Ranger "Danger" 12/28/2005- 5/31/12

He is gone.

I dropped him off at the vet early Thursday morning, I thought they would be giving him an IV and breathing treatments.  I thought Brian would come home and pick him up and in a few days he would be back to normal.

I thought wrong and he is gone.

It all happened so fast, it took all of us by surprise. Even the vet was ready to send him home with us (after giving us nebulizer training) to nurse him back to health.  As Brian showed up to bring him home, he was told "I thought I was going to be giving you your dog, instead I have to tell you that he has passed."

We are shocked, he is gone.

En rout to Park City, passing over mountain peaks, I received a call, one I thought would tell me that he had made great improvement, and was coming home.  Instead, I learned of our loss.

In harmony Madison and I wailed in grief, he is gone.

A weekend filled with soccer, gave a decent distraction for the two of us.  Reality crept in with the darkness of night.  I could fold up my sorrow and tuck it away, but knew it was temporary, I'd soon be home and faced with reality.

Our home had a gaping hole, he is gone.

It was cancer that had devastated his lungs, making them unable to fight off the pneumonia.  He wouldn't have made it much longer, and the reality is he only suffered a short time, and we never had to make the decision to let him go.

It was so fast, he is gone.

Brian said how fitting it was, Ranger never did anything small, it was always huge; He'd find the stinkiest mud hole to wallow in, he'd escape from the yard by busting a hole clean through the fence, he didn't chew on toys, he instead chewed the stairs.  The cancer was massive, his death was speedy.

He went big, he is gone.

I didn't say good bye, I didn't think it was the end. But looking back, he knew.  He let me brush him for hours, he let me lay with him and hold him.  He didn't come inside his last night with us, he laid out , in his favorite place under the bush. Had he been able, I think he would have wandered into the wilderness and laid in a stinky mud hole for his final rest.

He knew, he said good bye, and now he is gone.

Ranger, our snow dog,







Ranger, our fluff ball,


Ranger, our pillow



Ranger our goof ball,



Ranger our friend.





He may be gone, but his presence was a present.

Surprising, Overwhelming, Gushing, Love

We have 3 dogs. We used to have 2 dogs. And a really, really, long time ago (10 years) we only had one dog.  I never have had an overwhelming desire to have pets, most furry ones make me itch, dogs are most often an exception to that.  So don't ask me how we have now ended up with THREE dogs.  Maybe its a testament to the soft spot in my heart for lost causes... our first was a rescue, and the latest was an inheritance... only the middle one was by planning and choice.  Since we now have 3 dogs, my house is a disaster, the amount of fur has not tripled, or increased by 1/2, instead it has been an exponential increase.  As of late this has been the primary source of annoyance, and anxiety for me.

So why not just get rid of them, or even just one of them?  I don't seem all that attached, right?  It seems like a completely logical and easy decision. 

At least this is what I thought until one of them gets sick, like really sick.  Labored breathing, hacking, lethargic, and the tell tell sign - not eating.  The dog who tells time by when his food bowl should be filled won't eat.  Of course I took him to the vet yesterday, they checked him out, made sure he didn't have heart worm, and gave him some antibiotics, a bronchial-dilator, and anti-inflammatory.  I headed home with a renewed sense of hope, he would soon be on the mend. 

Last nigh I laid with him just so he wouldn't be alone, but his extremely labored breathing was so reminiscent of my own during an asthma attack, and all I could do was weep, the fear and panic I feel during an attack must be horrible for him - not knowing what is wrong.

Then again this morning he wouldn't eat.  We kept him inside out of the heat, and calm.  I was expecting to come home to a markedly improved dog, but when I got home he coughed up blood.  Of course the vet was out of the office by that time, so he goes in first thing in the morning. 

All evening I have just sat and brushed, and snuggled, and cried with worry for him.  Who would have though that below all that indifference I feel - or thought I felt - for these dogs, that I actually care this much, that I actually LOVE them.

This overwhelming, heart wrenching, tear jerking emotion has caught me completely off guard.  I tolerated, and most of the time even like these furry boys, but this is just so completely unexpected. To love an animal so much that I spend the night laying next to and comforting them, and sobbing tears, pleading with God to make him be ok. It's surprising to say the least.

Tonight I just hope his sleep is peaceful, that we make it till the morning, and that tomorrow they will know what is wrong with him.



Learned: Something new about myself, behind this cold hard indifferent exterior is an animal lover at heart.

A Doggy Nap

Just as I turned from the computer from my last post I was presented with another priceless photo opportunity...


We have been watching my sister-in-laws dogs while her and her husband are in Vegas. We are fortunate that all four dogs love each other. They play constantly, and thus they too get exhausted at earlier hours in the evening than normal.

Learned? Sleep must be the theme on this dreary evening.

Mr. Sand Man and his side kick Sandy Dog

Now that it is light later in the evenings, and a reasonable temperature, I can hardly keep Maddox in doors. His favorite place to be is his sand box. He pulls out all his dump trucks and loaders. Our dog Ranger is a good watch dog, and insists to be outside with him. He lays in the sand box, and allows Maddox to dump sand all over him. Such good boys....

Then, as Brian and I were watching TV, Ranger comes in, accompanied with the sound of sand falling off him onto our wood floor. THen preceeds to the carpet and as if in slow motion, he shakes his body, just as he would to shake water off. Brain (still in slow motion) says NOOOOOO! but it was too late.... I look up just in time to see a dust cloud, one that would rival that of Pig Pen's on Charlie Brown, encompassing the dog.

I have spent the last 20 minutes vacuuming sand out of the carpet, and sweeping up the sand off the wood floor (I got a whole dust pan full).

Learned? A sand box 3 feet from our back door seemed like a good idea for a 1st birthday present at the time, now... not so much. There needs to be substantial distance between a sand box and any entrance into a house.