Ok... so I am completely stressing right now... Brian and I have got the ball rolling on finding a new house in Palisade (this has been our long term plan for ever), but now that we are getting stuff going and not just talking about it I am stressing out.
I don't think it is the change so much as the uncertainty of it all... and then I start seeing EVERY! LITTLE! THING! that needs to be done in our house before it is ready to sell...and then I start thinking about how hard it is going to be to keep our house in "showing" condition with 2 kids, 2 dogs, 2 parents with more than full time jobs, soccer 3 nights a week, and soccer games in Denver for the next 5 weekends!
AHHHHH! I just start to self destruct -- literally! My brain quits forming coherent thoughts and plans, and I start swimming in circles like a fish with whirling disease, going no where and expending a lot of energy doing nothing, all the while being swept away by the current....
AND THEN... I remember that God is GOD, and that is all that really matters, this life is but a vapor, and all these decisions that I think are oh so important have little weight on eternity. I remember that God gives peace that passes all understanding (thankfully because I have little of it now with my whirling disease), and I remember that in all things God is in control.... I remember that I need to let go...
AND THEN I freak out again... because I am a CONTROL FREAK, and letting go isn't easy for me...
LEARNED: It is easy for me to say I trust God, but actually doing it is the challenge? Why is that?
2 comments:
Faith seems like an easy request. But it never is. I read something the other day that helped me, as I too get the "whirling disease" sometimes.
"Faith in the Lord is trust in the Lord. We cannot have true faith without also having complete trust in the Lord's will and in the Lord's timing. As a result, no matter how strong our faith is, it cannot produce a result contrary to the will of Him in whom we have faith. Remember that when your prayers do not seem to be answered in the way or at the time you desire. The exercise of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ is always subject to the order of heaven, to the goodness and will and wisdom and timing of the Lord. When we have that kind of faith and trust in the Lord, we have true security and serenity in our lives."
Know I love you, and it will be okay. Take deep breaths. Love, Vycci
Oh Brooke, You and I are cut out of the same material for sure. This was me from October of last year until about March of this year. But the good news is, we are in our new home and super happy that we went through all the stress that got us here. It's worth it in the long run. Just take it one day at a time and remember there IS an end in sight. GOOD LUCK!
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